Thank Heaven For Little Boys

I have always wanted the gender of my babies to be a surprise. Every doctors appointment I was so tempted to find out what we were having, but I knew it would be worth the wait if we didn't. I clearly remember when I was pushing in the delivery room being so exhausted, but what kept me going was knowing in just a few moments I was going to find out if our baby was a girl or a boy! I kept repeating the names we had picked out in my head and thinking "I am about to meet Luca or Felicity! Who will this little person be?"

Throughout my pregnancy everyone always asked me what I wanted, a boy or girl? This question always made me a little upset. What if I said boy, but it was a girl? Or vice versa? I honestly did not care!

The other question I got constantly was, "What do you think it is? A boy or girl?" This one just annoyed me. It made me want to scream, "I have no idea!!" but hormones probably played a role in that response... Everyone said I carried like a boy, but I got sick like a girl. I craved sweets which means girl, but I didn't gain a ton of weight which means boy. All those wives tales are so ridiculous, and none of them mean a thing in my opinion. But still, everyone was constantly bugging me about it. This made me want to just find out to stop the nonsense! But I'm so glad I didn't!

When the Dr. lifted up the little person that had been growing inside me for nine months and my husband said the words I had been waiting so long to hear.. "It's a boy!", I cried. I was thrilled beyond belief. There he was, Luca John. My son. I have a son!

When and if I get pregnant again... In the far, far out future (Seriously people, Luca is 7 months old, stop asking if I'm pregnant!) I will definitely be keeping the gender a surprise again! Years ago, if someone had told me my first child was a boy, inside I would have been hoping that my second was a girl. But I can honestly say, boy or girl, I do not care! Give me a healthy baby and I am a happy mommy. Although, I may be slightly biased, but I think my husband and I made a pretty darn cute little boy, so I really wouldn't mind if that happens again... Just sayin'.

 Rockin' the Mohawk today.

 

 Mom got her "do the baby's hair fix" and Luca, well he just gets to look like a little stud.

Luca at 7 Months



Luca John is officially 7 months old. And oh boy, if we thought the day he turned 6 months was rough, we were el wrongo! His 7 month birthday really couldn't get much worse.. my poor little boy.

Where to start? Well 2 days ago he was diagnosed with Roseola and has had as high as a 102 temperature. His temp today is much lower, but now we're just waiting for the lovely rash. On top of that, his first tooth is finally popping through and I can tell the other one is soon to follow. We have been downing infant Tylenol every 4 hours on the dot. He was up about 15 times last night (that's an approximation because I stopped counting after number 5)! So he's ready to lose it at any given moment if I'm not holding him or feeding him. So needless to say, mommy went through the Starbucks drive thru today and got a Trenta... Yes please!

As rough as it's been, when Luca was born I swore to myself that every month on the 12th I would take his picture. I wanted so bad to just wait until we had a slightly better day, but I knew someday, as awful as it is now, I will want to remember this moment. So we went outside, because the gloomy weather perfectly reflected our feelings about today, and we snapped a few pictures. I think there's one where he's smiling, and another where he's half smiling. The rest he's either looking away from me or sucking his lip. But we did it! And I'm happy we did.

The one smiling picture...

 

This face perfectly reflects him at 7 months.. tongue always half out of his mouth...

 

Cutest half smile around...

 

 If he could say words... "Mom, I feel like crap! Stop taking my picture!"

 

Because I absolutely love his sweater with the ears... (from my favorite store, Baby Gap)

 

Last picture, because he just got too tired of sitting and fell over.

 

On a positive note. This past month Luca has grown up so much! He sits solid. He has gotten on his knees a few times like he's getting ready to crawl. He can scoot on his tummy a little and spin completely around in a circle. He blows bubbles. He is learning to clap. He absolutely loves playing peek-a-boo, being thrown in the air, being in his stroller, swinging, bananas, sweet potatoes, and when anyone gives him attention. He hates being alone, squash, and taking medicine.

 

Luca, I love you sweet boy! I can't wait to see what this next month has in store! Here's to hoping your 8 month birthday is a little better. Pleeease, momma needs a break!

 



 



Counting My Blessings

 

I've got a sick baby, dishes piled in the sink, one load of laundry started that has now been sitting in the washer for hours because I haven't had time to deal with it, baby toys are covering the floor, my dog is staring at me because she wants me to play with her so bad and I don't have the time, my uniform is on: leggings, comfy shirt and a ponytail (I hate wearing my hair up, but if I don't want 100 hairs ripped out of my head today it's what I have to do). On the bright side my bed is made, but that's only because if it's not I will seriously lose my sanity and the entire 1 minute it took me to make it Luca was screaming in the background begging for me to pick him up.

The last couple days have been a challenge to say the least, but this, it's real life. And you know what? It's good. At least I'm trying really hard to think it is.

I feel like I've accomplished absolutely nothing today and that everything is going wrong, but when I think a little harder I know that's not true. Luca is alive, and I'm alive with some of my sanity still intact. So that's an accomplishment right there.

And that's not even close to everything! So, I'm going to sit here (with Luca on my lap or right next to me, because if he's not he will most likely be screaming) and I'm going to write down all the things I'm thankful for....

1.) Health: for me and Luca. This is only the 2nd time he has really been sick in his whole 7 months on this earth. Also, I'm healthy and can take care of him and give him my full care and attention.
2.) My baby! I have a baby who gets sick and needs me! What a blessing!
3.) My husband: Who will be home at 4:30 and hopefully take Luca and let me do the dishes, laundry, clean, and gather back the sanity I have lost.
4.) Jobs: My husband has been blessed with a job that allows me to not have to work! Now usually I do work a little because I enjoy it and let's be honest, a little break is amazing! But my job is flexible enough, so that if on a day like today or yesterday I need to stay home all day, I am totally able to do it.
5.) Doctors: When Luca woke up with his fever yesterday, we were able to get into the Dr. within 2 hours of when I called!
6.) Tylenol: Even though half of it ends up on his shirt or the floor at least I can force enough down that his fever almost disappears!
7.) Fenced in yard: On days like today when I cannot give my dog the attention she deserves I can just let her out the door and she can chase all the bunnies in our yard to get rid of some energy!
8.) My home: I have a home that gets messy and keeps us warm... or cool. Depending on how the weather is feeling these days.
9.) Chocolate: That's all.
10.) My heavenly Father: When I'm feeling down or just overwhelmed with life, I can always go to Him. He always hears me and helps me not to be anxious about everything going on in my life that, let's be honest, makes me anxious.

Well, I think 10 is a good number to stop, even though I'm sure I could keep going. But pretty soon Luca will need to eat again, and be changed again, and then need a nap. And amidst all the crazy and things that need to be done, I can't wait to just stop, and rock my baby to sleep. That's what he needs right now. Everything else can wait. And that's ok. Just being with him in that moment is the biggest blessing.
 

 

I was setting up my camera and he was happy for more than 5 seconds.. I had to take a picture!

 

This. Was reality.

Just a Mom

 

Basically, since forever, my biggest dream in life has been to be a mom. I know, I know, a lot of girls say that, but looking back I can't believe how much of my life as a little girl revolved around it. My Bitty Baby went with me EVERYWHERE. Then, when I turned 7 and finally got a Samantha doll, she and my Bitty Baby went with me, EVERYWHERE. I'd pack up my little blue diaper bag anytime we left the house. I think I would even buckle my dolls in the car. I would tuck them in their beds every night. I remember even being anxious if my family was out late and I wasn't going to have time to put my dolls in their pajamas and get them ready for bed! I think my sisters probably thought I was crazy... I was probably a little too obsessed with playing mommy with my dolls, but it just felt so real and right. It's all I wanted and I couldn't wait to be old enough to have a baby of my own.

But looking back at my childhood and dreams of being a mommy, always brings me back to kindergarten and an art project that I remember like it was yesterday... Our assignment was to color a picture of ourselves that portrayed what we wanted to be when we grew up. Once we finished we had to take our pictures up to our teacher one at a time. I remember standing in line with my picture hearing all the kids say that they wanted to be a doctor or an astronaut. Then the girl standing in front of me said she wanted to be a cat... Even at 5 years old I knew that was not going to happen and I thought she was crazy. After the teacher smiled at her and took her paper she looked at me. I remember handing her my picture. It was literally a picture of my mom. Dark hair, dark eyes. The teacher asked what I wanted to be. I looked at her and said, "A mom". The next part really just gets me, and thinking back I cannot believe this was her response. She took my paper looked at me with an inquisitive look and said, "Really?..." and then proceeded to the next kid. I remember feeling confused. What was wrong with just wanting to be a mom? I remember thinking, should I take my picture back and draw something else? I didn't, but I was confused. How could she take the cat picture and smile, but take my picture and question it? It made my 5 year old self question my dream. To me, being a mom someday was everything, but I guess to her it was "just being a mom". In her mind I was suppose to strive for more. But really, what is more fulfilling than motherhood?

I've worked. I still work a little. And I love it, but there's nothing more fulfilling than waking up to my baby boy, smiling, and reaching for me to pick him up and give him a kiss. Or hearing him giggle because I did something stupid and he thought it was funny. Or watching him discover his fingers, his toes. Seeing him sit for the first time. Or letting him fall asleep in my arms after a long day of nursing, napping, and discovering all the new things this world has to offer. This. This is what "just" being a mom is all about. And this. This is my new reality. It's beautiful, it's amazing, it's "just" what I wanted it to be, and more.

Here it Goes

I've been thinking about starting a blog for so long... seriously years now. And here I am writing my first post. Wow.

I have been going back and forth about doing this for what seems like forever. And after a few encouraging words from some people I have finally decided to give it a go!

So here it goes...

I have been blessed, too blessed with the life God has given me. I want to share some of it with others. The joys, the tears, the good, the bad. My goal is not to put myself on a pedestal to showcase my perfect life, but to actually do the opposite. Being a wife and mom is hard, and if I can share some experiences I go through with others and be an encouragement to even one person, I've done what I came here to do.

I'm scared. I'm excited. And in closing...

"...Let us be sober, having put on the breastplate of faith and love, and as a helmet, the hope of salvation. For God has not destined us for wrath, but for obtaining salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us, so that whether we are awake or asleep, we will live together with Him. Therefore encourage one another and build up one another, just as you also are doing."
1 Thessalonians 5: 8-11